Turn off the receiver
Not tuning. Breakthrough
A microdose tunes the receiver. A big dose turns the receiver off — and you see what’s been broadcasting your whole life.
After a 20-year gap I had 5g of dried mushrooms. I crushed them, brewed them in hot water, drank around 3.5g. And all I saw in the dark were two installations:
- Everything is beautiful and glowing
- Lines of fate (kind of like in Slaughterhouse-Five)
I understood it all instantly because I already knew it — everything else just fell away. Understood that what should interest me first is me. That I’d been looking through the binoculars the wrong way my whole life.
On mushrooms the first time I had closed-eye visuals — and I saw my whole life laid out. You see the whole picture. Everything at once, and yourself inside the picture.
With mushrooms 1g is entirely different from 4g. Qualitatively different. Music sounds alien, the headspace turns from euphoric to spiritual.
I kept wondering — when ego dissolves and you end up in a tiny universe, how do I see this? With what?
That’s what big doses show you. How reality and life are put together. That you’re the field-dweller, not a player. That a space of variants exists. That maya can be pierced — I pierced it underwater on a retreat, no mushrooms, but mushrooms take you to the same place.
Not doing psychedelics is criminal. You forget what you’re alive for.
If it pulls you back into the negative — that’s not the psychedelic failing. Something inside you is missing. You have to fill yourself first.
First time — full dose. With a guide. With intention. Microdoses come after, for daily life. And what locks it in is a clean head — a sober disciplined mind. The strongest psychedelic of all.